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Met a Blasian girl on Hinge and now I’m overthinking everything

BASIC

10 posts

Hey all, been lurking here for a bit and finally wanted to post because I’m kinda in my head about this. I’m a 31M Asian guy in Toronto and I matched with this Blasian girl on Hinge about a month ago. We’ve gone out 4 times now, mostly just drinks and one ramen spot in Koreatown, and the vibe has been really easy. Like, we talk for hours and she’s super funny, but I can’t tell if she’s just being friendly or actually into me. I’ve dated Asian women before, but this feels different in a good way and also makes me more nervous for some reason. She brought up going to a jazz bar in Kensington Market next weekend, which feels like a date-date, but I’ve also had people be casual like that before. I guess I’m asking: how do you read the signs without making it weird? I don’t wanna mess up something that could be good by being too cautious or too eager.

Mar 15

2 replies

Brittany S.BASIC

#1 · Mar 15

I’d say don’t overread it, but also don’t talk yourself out of obvious chemistry. I’m a BW and I’ve had guys act super careful because they were scared of “ruining the vibe,” and honestly that can make things stall out. If you like her, be a little more direct after the next date. Something like, “I’ve really been enjoying getting to know you, and I’d love to keep seeing where this goes.” That’s not cheesy, and it gives her room to be honest. Also, Toronto dating can be weirdly slow, so sometimes you just gotta say the thing instead of waiting for a perfect sign.

David Okafor

#2 · Mar 15

Honestly, if she’s making plans with you that far ahead and suggesting specific places, that’s usually a good sign. Most people don’t keep going out with someone 4 times unless they’re interested at least a little. The jazz bar thing especially sounds intentional, not just random hanging out. I’d just keep it light and see how she acts in person. If she’s touching your arm, asking personal questions, or staying longer than she needs to, that’s usually pretty telling. You don’t need to force a big confession moment. Just enjoy the date and maybe at the end say something simple like you’ve been having a really good time with her.