ForumsGen Z & Millennial Swirl Datingfirst time dating outside my race and i keep overthinking everything lol

first time dating outside my race and i keep overthinking everything lol

I’m 24, in Chicago, and I’ve been talking to this girl I met on Hinge for about a month. I’ve only dated within my own race before, so this is all kind of new for me. She’s super cool, we’ve gone to a couple coffee shops in Logan Square and one late-night taco spot in Pilsen, and honestly the vibe is great. But I keep catching myself overthinking dumb stuff, like whether I’m coming off awkward or if I’m supposed to act different because she’s from a different background. What’s messing with my head more is telling my parents. They’re not like super strict or anything, but I know they’re gonna have opinions. I’m not even sure if I should bring it up now or wait until it gets more serious. Has anyone else dealt with that weird mix of excitement and nerves? I really like her and don’t wanna ruin it by being in my own head all the time.
Mar 11
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2 replies
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Brittany S.BASIC
#1 · Mar 11
Honestly, you’re probably overthinking it way more than she is. If the dates are going well, that’s the main thing. The whole point is she likes you for you, not some performance version of you. I’m in Oakland and went through something similar with my now-boyfriend, and I had to stop treating every convo like I was representing my whole community or something. That pressure is fake and exhausting.
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connor odeaVIPADMIN
#2 · Mar 11
I’d say don’t rush the parent talk unless it becomes relevant. You don’t owe anybody a big announcement after a month of dating. Just keep getting to know her and let it grow naturally. Also, if you’re worried about saying something awkward, just be honest when it comes up. Like, “I’m a little new to this but I like you and I want to do this right.” That’s way better than trying to sound smooth and weirding yourself out.
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