Forums Passport Bros & Dating AbroadDating in Bangkok was way easier than I expected, but I’m worried I’m missing the red flags

Dating in Bangkok was way easier than I expected, but I’m worried I’m missing the red flags

Lisa Nakamura

PREMIUM

15 posts

Lisa NakamuraPREMIUM

I’ve been in Bangkok for 3 months now on and off, and dating here has been a completely different game. Back home in Chicago I always felt like I was doing too much just to get a response on Hinge. Here, I’ve had more matches on Tinder and Bumble in a week than I usually get in a whole month. I’ve met women in Thonglor, a couple from Coffee Meets Bagel, and one through a friend of a friend who took me out to a night market in Ari. The thing is, it almost feels too easy sometimes. I’m a 29-year-old Latino guy and I get a lot of attention here, which is obviously nice, but I keep wondering if I’m being naive. Some women are super straightforward about wanting a serious relationship, others mention wanting help with visa stuff, and a few seem genuinely interested in my life back home. I’m not against cross-cultural dating at all, but I don’t want to get played because I’m caught up in the honeymoon phase. How do you tell the difference between real interest and somebody just seeing you as a ticket out?

Mar 22

2 replies

Priya PatelPREMIUM

#1 · Mar 22

You’re smart to question it early. Bangkok can feel like dating on easy mode, especially if you’re used to the US. But the easy part is exactly why you have to pay attention. When women are direct about visas or money stuff right away, at least they’re being honest. The trickier ones are the ones who seem super sweet until you start noticing little patterns. I’d say watch consistency more than charm. Do they only want to meet at expensive places? Do they ask about your job way too much? Do they disappear when you suggest something low-key like mall food or a walk by the river? I met my wife in Bangkok through a language exchange near Asok, and what stood out was that she was just as happy eating street noodles as going out. That’s what made it feel real.

Rachel KimBASIC

#2 · Mar 22

I live in Pattaya half the year and I’ve seen a lot of guys get blinded by the attention. My honest opinion is that you should assume some level of opportunism, not because everyone’s shady, but because the dynamic is different there. Foreign guy + local woman often comes with money assumptions whether people admit it or not. That doesn’t mean don’t date. Just move with your eyes open. Meet her friends, see how she treats service staff, notice whether she has her own goals. The best relationship I had in Thailand was with someone who had her own career and didn’t need me for anything except company. That changed everything. Once the relationship stopped being about rescue or escape, it got a lot healthier.