Forums Single Parents Dating InterraciallyDating as a single mom in Atlanta has been weirdly harder than I thought

Dating as a single mom in Atlanta has been weirdly harder than I thought

13 posts

So I’m a 34yo mom of two in Atlanta, and I finally started dating again after being divorced for almost 3 years. I’m on Hinge and Bumble mostly, and I’ve been talking to a Puerto Rican guy for about a month now. He’s great with my kids in the little ways already — asks how their school day was, remembers my daughter’s soccer schedule — but I’m still stuck in my own head about when to actually introduce him to them. My kids are 7 and 10, and their dad is still pretty involved, so I don’t want to make it feel like I’m just cycling people in and out. At the same time, I know if this turns into something real, our family is gonna be a mixed cultural thing and I want to do it right. He grew up in Brooklyn, I grew up in Georgia, and even the way we talk about discipline is different. How do y’all handle the “meeting the kids” part without making it a huge, awkward production? Or is that just me overthinking it?

Mar 14

2 replies

DeAndre W.

#1 · Mar 14

I get wanting to protect your kids, but I also think kids pick up on way more than we give them credit for. I’m a dad in Philly dating a Black woman with a 6yo daughter, and we didn’t do a formal introduction at all. We just kept seeing each other in settings where her daughter was already around other adults, like a birthday party and then a picnic with cousins. It felt more natural than sitting the kid down like, ‘Here is the new person.’ The bigger thing for us has been talking about culture in normal life. Her daughter noticed my family’s food and accents right away, so we just answered stuff honestly instead of acting awkward. If it gets serious, the day-to-day stuff matters more than the one big introduction.

Keisha L.

#2 · Mar 14

You’re not overthinking it, honestly. I’m in Houston and I have a 9yo son, and I waited way too long once because I wanted everything to be perfect. All that did was make me more anxious. What worked better the second time was keeping it low pressure — like a quick lunch at a park after we’d already been dating a few months, not some big dinner where everybody’s staring at each other. Also, since the dad is involved, I’d keep the communication super clear and boring. Not in a bad way, just no surprise updates. If it starts getting serious, tell your kids’ dad before the kids meet him, especially if the relationship is heading toward regular time together. That’s helped me avoid so much unnecessary drama.