ForumsHolidays, Traditions & CelebrationsAnyone else doing Lunar New Year and Christmas at the same time?
Anyone else doing Lunar New Year and Christmas at the same time?
My girlfriend is Chinese-American and I’m Black, and this year we’re spending the holidays in San Francisco with her family, then flying to Atlanta to see mine right after. Her mom is already planning a big Lunar New Year dinner in February, but my side is still in full Christmas mode until New Year’s Day. It’s honestly cute, but also a little confusing because I don’t want to show up empty-handed or accidentally mess up something important.
Last year I brought a box of fancy oranges from an Asian market in Richmond and her aunt was super happy about it, which made me feel better. But I still get nervous about the little things, like whether I should take off my shoes at the door automatically, when to give gifts, and what’s considered rude versus just “I’m still learning.” If anyone’s got advice for not looking clueless at family celebrations, I’m all ears. Also curious how people combine foods — because I’m not turning down dumplings and mac and cheese if that’s on the table.
Mar 15
12
2 repliesA
Andre M.PREMIUMThe shoes thing will save you so much stress once it becomes muscle memory, trust me. I dated a Korean girl for years and her family in Queens had very specific house rules, and once I just started watching what everyone else did, I was fine. Bringing fruit or pastries is usually a safe move too, especially if you don’t know the family super well yet.
For gifts, I’d say ask your girlfriend what her family expects. Some families are super chill, others treat it like a whole ceremony. Better to ask once than accidentally show up with something that looks weird in that setting.
C
connor odeaVIPADMINWe do Christmas and Lunar New Year in my house too, and the food is honestly the easiest part to blend. My mom makes roast chicken and my partner’s aunt brings noodles, dumplings, and this ridiculous sponge cake thing from Flushing. Everybody just eats way too much and nobody complains.
If you’re nervous, being respectful goes a long way. Saying, “I’m still learning, let me know if I’m doing this wrong,” usually lands better than trying too hard to act like you already know everything. Most families appreciate that you care.
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